Birthday Cards Help Celebrate an Unforgettable 50th Birthday

My 50th birthday will be remembered forever and not only because of the birthday cards I received! We have a tradition in our office of taking out the “birthday girl” on all major milestone birthdays. There is a group of 15 or so people who belong to this special birthday gathering. We go to the same restaurant year after year to celebrate, gossip, drink and generally have fun.

My 50th birthday started out rather routinely except for the excessive “over the hill” gag jokes which included Depends, a silly cane, and some not-so-nice gags I won’t mention (I often say “with friends like mine, I don’t need enemies!”). I did receive some lovely happy birthday cards though and I enjoyed reading through each of the greeting cards my friends gave me.

Soon after dinner arrived, I noticed my friend Dolly looking at me with bug eyes, face turning red and not saying anything. I continued to look at her with a blank stare until the woman next to her said, ”Oh my gosh, she’s choking!” Not even thinking, I jumped up, grabbed her from behind and started doing the Heimlich maneuver. It was not working and I felt her going down to the floor. Getting panicky, I thought if she falls on the floor it’s over. I gave one last frantic squeeze and out popped the lodged piece of steak. Dolly sat down and I collapsed in my seat thinking I was going to have a heart attack due to the adrenaline rush and die on my 50th birthday!

Well needless to say, this event has been mentioned every year since my 50th as my birthday draws near, and in every birthday card I receive from Dolly. It will be my most memorable birthday ever, not because of the happy birthday cards I received, but because both of us survived the ordeal. In the future, please just send the personalized birthday cards and skip the excitement! My heart’s getting too old to handle it!