Most people, upon learning of a miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death, don’t know how to express their condolences. It’s not that they don’t care; it’s just that they don’t know the right thing to say when this unimaginable event occurs, and all too often they say nothing. But a simple message of heartfelt condolences conveyed that can be conveyed in sympathy cards does provide a little comfort to the grieving mother or parents. It also shows you are acknowledging their loss.
Losing a baby, whether delivered or not, is a tremendous loss. The mother has frequently already bonded with the child growing in her womb and both parents have already imagined what the future holds for their child. From choosing a name to choosing the nursery theme, this child has already become part of the family. The loss of this child is just as painful and real as losing someone they have known for years.
Though many people may choose not to send out sympathy cards for fear of saying the wrong thing, it is perfectly correct to send one that expresses your condolences and shows you care. However, be sure to avoid those well-meant but hurtful phrases such as:
- You can always have another baby
- Maybe it was meant to be
- They are in a better place
Knowing what not to say is helpful but many people still struggle to find the right words to offer comfort in condolence cards during such an emotional time. You may wish to ponder the list of closing sympathy phrases found on our site to assist you in this difficult yet important task when composing your sympathy wishes.